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2/19/2010 Landmark

February 20, 2010

Friday was memorable for two reasons, I will publicly discuss one, my first felony.  With comic unintentionality I participated and succeeded in bribing a uniformed law enforcement to procure a favorable outcome.

I got pulled over for driving like a Bostonian but the cop was affable and we got to talking.  I explained that I was not from around here, a bit lost,my phone has crappy GPS and that is precisely why I was going 60 in a 30.

OFFICER “…Well I’m gonna haveta write ya a ticket”

DAN “A ticket?  How much?”

“You have two options, if you plead guilty just pay the $70 or you can take this driving course on the internet”

“So I can just pay the $70 right now?”

steps closer as if to kiss me “I suppose we could work something like that out”

as I hand him a wad of disheveled bills “Think I could maybe get a receipt or something?”

And kids, THAT is how I committed my very first felony.


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